Tag Archives: motherhood

Get Out and Play- An Endangered Concept

26 Jun

So, here I am, having a chat with my preggo friend, about how all her kid wants to do is go, go, GO, (a rare quality these days) and it takes all she can to entertain him, being in the process of growing a minion and all. Not a problem- go, go, GO play with your friends, right? WRONG. Kids, outside, playing- its like, UNHEARD OF these days. Or at least it seems like it is. And what kind of a kid wants to play outside, alone? It sucks a real big juicebox.

It literally looks like this on my street.

See, his friends aren’t the “play outside until the sun comes down” type. At least not as often as they should be (ahem- summer break…EVERYDAY, minions!) And they also aren’t the “get dirty” type either, and actually get into trouble for playing…and getting dirty…

problem- solved!

To which, I just gotta say….What??

Okay, firstly, my mom probably would’ve F.R.E.A.K.E.D. O.U.T. if we were INSIDE every, single, hour, of every, single day. Maybe its because we didn’t have all of these cool video games and phones, gadgets and the interwebs to entertain us for literal days at a time.

Here’s lookin’ at you, Satan’s favorite pastime.

 No. We had playsets, trampolines, pools, trails, woods, bikes, balls, water. We had FRIENDS and we actually SAW their faces, not their profile pictures, everyday. We had REAL social media, REAL games, a REAL childhood.

kick the can? YEAH BUDDYYY. Sign me up!! I will DESTROY YOU!!!

But all my mom had to do was yell “go play” (if that somedays) and we were GONE. Out the door, to the backyard, playing things, building things, destroying things, blowing up things…you get it. Having good ol’ ‘Merican FUN. And we didn’t come home until we heard to dinner bell ring! (yep, we had one) It’s just like, I don’t even know. So weird now that kids don’t PLAY.

I googled ‘merican fun….hahaha you win, google.

Seriously though. It didn’t take a whole lot to get us out. We had a big yard, and lived in the middle of nowhere, so being abducted by some creep wasn’t really an issue as it can be in bigger areas (though we DID have a peeping Tom, but that’s another story). So, I guess I can see where ‘rents these days, with the constant news coverage and all that, may be a little paranoid about sending Suzy and Jimmy outside to play, while they work/cook/clean/relax/crush candy (<– judgment free zone, you guilty mommies!)

I wouldn’t let my two outside unsupervised either. So my next point…

But here’s an idea, you silly Sally’s— GO OUTSIDE WITH YOUR SPAWN! Or if they’re old enough- watch from the door/window/porch!

**SHOCKING!** Guess what?! You can do a majority of things from OUT OF DOORS, AS WELL! And, if you are worried about dirt and germs and pedos, you are right there watching! Now, with mine, I am ALWAYS outside, on account of having no yard and some real winners for neighbors. My friend, she lives in a quieter part of town, with a yard, playset, the works, and he is old enough to have some space. But like I said earlier- who wants to play alone all day?

Sucks a big juicebox, huh kid?

So, for you parents who frit and fret over every germ, worm, bump, lump and speck of dirt, I’m going to do what I do best and make a list for you. A list of WHY outside play and interaction are necessary for a healthy child, and a kick ass childhood.

You’re welcome.

BENEFITS OF OUTSIDE ACTIVITY AND PLAY

they see me rollin…they hatin….

Firstly- and most obviously, EXERCISE. Running around, chasing, catching, biking, swimming, ya de da de da, all of it burns those happy meals right off. According to the American Heart Association, right NOW, one of every three kids/teens are either overweight or obese. ONE IN THREE. 1 in 3. 1:3. 1/3. Let that sink in.

‘Baby fat’ is gone by age 2/3…unless there is a medical issue, kids should not be having this problem. Exercise and proper nutrition people.

Think of all the time spent sitting, watching, eating, lazing about. That time needs to be spent burning off the excess calories kids eat, ESPECIALLY if they favor French fries over fruit. Obesity in kids wasn’t a huge problem even a generation ago, and almost unheard of previous to that, because guess what?! WE WERE OUTSIDE!!!

In the movies, there is always one. Now, to be accurate, there needs to be one in three.

Second- Dirt and Germs are GOOD for you! Yes, you read that right. The only way to build up immunity to something, is to be exposed to it. Your body needs to experience the germ, fight the germ, learn from the germ, and be one with the germ (I dunno, sounded good) in order to overcome it. Think about it, what are vaccines? GERMS. If you lived your life in a bubble, never exposed to anything, could you even imagine the reaction to a sneeze or some pollen you may have? It would be like Hiroshima is your ‘immune system’.

BOOM. THERE GOES YOUR HEALTH.

Third- decreased stress and anger, among other things. Yes, kids get stressed too. And angry, and whiny, and bratty. Well, one way to solve that is to let them stay holed up inside all day yelling at the computer, OR, send their ‘happy asses’ outside and let them literally kick rocks (or throw them, or whatever), until they feel better. Let me tell you, there is nothing a good magnifying glass fire, game of king of the hill, or super soaker fight won’t solve.

that’s right. Pretend whatever you are aiming for is your brother’s head. you become a real good shot.

Another benefit- gross motor skills, coordination. You practice these with running, jumping, throwing, kicking, what have you. It’s a no brainer that being outdoors and DOING THINGS are going to benefit you more in the long run than exercising your eyeballs staring at the TV while engaging in a fine motor skill of pincher grasping popcorn….just sayin’.

……………… >.<……………….

And lastly, my number one benefit of playing outside, with others? Imagination and friendship are developed. Seriously, whether it’s playing a mean game of AYSO and pretending its the Olympics, or building a tree house, playing paintball, or riding bikes- you are using your mind, and making friends.

Fack yeah!

Basically, people, GET YOUR KIDS OUTSIDE!!!! It’s SUMMER. Its time for free play and fun. I can’t tell you how many times a day I get asked if we can “go outside”, and go outside we do! TV and technology can be a drag, and totally addicting, I get that, but YOU are the ADULT. YOU decide when they have it. Unplug and go do something!

If we can do it, you can do it! (look how little they are!) That’s imaginations and gross motor skills hard at work folks!

Links to prove my point, so we all don’t think I’m talking out of my bum. 🙂

http://www.aahperd.org/headstartbodystart/activityresources/upload/benefits-of-outdoor-play-2.pdf

http://www.aahperd.org/headstartbodystart/activityresources/upload/benefits-of-outdoor-play-2.pdf

http://g2goutside.org/benefits-of-outdoor-play/

Girl Power

13 Jun

If I were a boy, I would be the PRETTIEST BOY IN THE WORLD. That’s right folks. Without a DOUBT, I would manscape, cover blemishes with concealer, MATCH my CLEAN clothes, file and clean my nails (hint hint, hubby), get my hair done at a salon, and maybe even rock a little rouge. Who knows. All I know is, I would be this guy:

 

 

Legend…wait for it….DARY.

 

 

That’s right. I would be Barney Stintson. THEE ladies man. THEE alpha-bro. I would be the guy that wouldn’t need a wingman, but just took one out of courtesy. Why would I be a Pretty-Ricky? Well, because, things like body hair, and sweat, and just gross-guy-ness disgust me.

 

 

ohmygawdno. no.no.no. *shudders*

 

 

Now, obviously, this is ME, and not YOU. Go be all hairy and proud, you beast, but don’t expect a hug, man. I’m just saying if I were a GUY, I would be a very meticulously groomed guy. I would have to be. Thanks to my genes, I have to be NOW and I’m a WOMAN for Pete’s sake. I can’t go more than a week without waxing something. Could you imagine if I was a guy?!

 

 

Dudes, it really DOES hurt, but eventually you will get used to it. Buck up, buttercup.

 

 

No way, Jose. I’m glad I am a female. And yes, I know ladies like to gripe during “that time of the month” that they wish they were a dude. But no. No you don’t. I will take my crazy mood swinging, ice cream eating (thank GOD for the store’s deal this week, let me tell you), husband missing, lifetime watching, biological clock ticking, (just kidding- that needs to be fixed), cramping, crying, lazy, fat girl, Aunt Flo issues for a week every month (minus about 18 or so HOPEFULLY SOMEDAY) for the REST OF MY LIFE, over having to be a hairy guido dude ONE DAY.

 

 

ok. white sheets AND undies?? Someone’s a risk taker.

 

 

My point is this. Girl-hood and Woman-dom isn’t so bad ladies. I mean, hell, honestly, would you want to be a man for one day? I mean, yes, we do have to put the extra effort in when we preform hygiene and dressing, but honestly, most guys who make you get all high-school girly do too…

 

 

I promise you, he did NOT wake up looking like this. That took effort and man-scaping.

 

 

And there are bonuses to being a lady, after all. I mean, here’s my top favorite things about being a female:

 

 

  • Dressing- I don’t know about you, but I. LOVE. TO. SHOP. And dress up, and be a cute little meatball. Guys really don’t have much of a selection of, well, anything to wear. Think of all the cute clothes and accessories you would be lacking in your life, if you had a porksword.

 

think of all the closet space? sigh.

 

 

  • Getting your way- this one is about to get a lot of flak, I can FEEL IT, but guess what? I . DON’T. CARE. (its my blog, so neener-neener) Yes, women have come a LONG WAY since the 20th century. YES, woman can do everything a man can. Yes, yes, yes. BUT, even with all of this progress, I can  USUALLY get: out of a ticket, a little sympathy at work, assistance with homework, or work assignments, out of hard labor tasks, waited on, doors opened, seats pulled, the bill paid, by simply having a bajingo. And at least I have the balls to admit I like it this way.

 

take note: doesn’t work so well on lady cops. SIGH.

 

 

 

  • Pretty-fied: Average dudes really would get a lot of harassment for covering their blemishes, concealing dark spots and fine lines, having their nails and hair done, anything that would make them concerned about their appearance and “feminine”. I know for a FACT if I was a guy, I wouldn’t want to have to walk around with a pizza face when there are products RIGHT THERE at the store that can help cover it while the medicine does its job. And quite honestly, the more I see younger guys on social media apps, the more I think that celebrities looks affect them too. They notice a guy is “perfect”, just like girls do. But them using products is “wrong”. Bullshit. I mean, it may seem like a hassle to shave, wax and put the face on, but shoot, I feel way better when I do it. I don’t really care how narcissistic and self-centered that sounds, admit it to yourself RIGHT NOW ladies, that if someone took your razor and mascara away, you might cry. Just imagine if you were a dude who didn’t fit the standard and THEN got harassed for trying to use products, like tinted male moisturizer. Not so fair, is it?

 

maybe i’m just anti-feminist, maybe i’m behind on the times, but this is what I feel like when I don’t put my makeup on. if I was a guy, good god.

 

 

 

  • Music/Movie tastes: As a girl, I can have tastes in music ranging in everything from Metallica to Taylor Swift, Aerosmith to Ke$ha, Biggie to Britney. A guy? NOt so much. A guy admitting he owns the new One Direction or Justin Bieber CD, would be like, social death. But a girl? Totally ok. Actually makes her “cool”. Same with movies. A girl watching gore, sci-fi, comedies, chick flicks? Normal. A dude in line for the new Nicholas Sparks movie? His girl better be in the bathroom…

 

QUICK! How many guys do you spot at this concert? …yup…

 

 

 

  • The gift of life- I suppose that this is actually the most selfless, and my favorite part of being a lady, therefore I saved it for last. There is nothing on this whole earth that makes me feel as complete and as happy as my children. I never felt better about myself than I did when I was pregnant, even if I was puking non-stop, had swollen feet and stretch marks all over. I wouldn’t trade a second of my time as a mother-to-be or as a mother for anything in this world. I’m not saying I want to be an octomom, or have nineteen kids and counting, but babies are the one thing I can do right, and so help me god there will (hopefully) be more, when, you know, I get my husband back. (and if I didn’t have such issues during my pregnancies, I would LOVE to be a surrogate for someone, but I can’t.)  And yes, yes, you do need a man (or man genes) to complete the process of conception, but from there on out, its all on the momma. The fact that your body can SUPPORT and GROW another WHOLE LIFE is just, like, amazeballs. You should be proud of that, if you’ve had the opportunity to do so.

 

Seriously no better feeling in the whole world. And, like, I’ll have a GREAT mister this time, whaaaattt?!?! SCORE. I’ll be like, Pam and Jim happy, shoot.

 

 

 

I’m not a guy, so I mean, I can’t really tell you how a dude’s perspective might differ, but I mean, this whole “double standard” thing we bitch about? Yeah, but not really. They can have it rough too. Guys are expected to be tough, rough, and handsome, at ALL TIMES. This is not an option. They can’t CRY. Never a moment of weakness, never fretting about their appearance. No thanks. I’ll take my cramps and ice cream, post this, get on Facebook and look at all the cutie pie babies, then watch some chick-flicks. I’m all good with that, and all the parts of being a girl.

 

 

Oh come on. Look at the title. You HAD to know this was coming.

Teen Mom Syndrome- Scared Celibate!

7 Sep

I was walking through the mall one day, and happened to overhear a group of girls, about 13 or 14 years old squealing with delight over the fact that one of their friends was “O.M.G REALLY PREGNANT!” (yes, they said O M G as opposed to oh my God. Don’t even get me started.) Yeah, its none of my business, and whatever, and no, I did not say anything. But if I could have I would’ve taken those little girls out of the aisles of Justice and Deb’s (tween and teen clothing stores) and into the REALITY of being a young mommy for a day. First, we’d start with some facts about babies no one knows until they have one themselves.

EXPENSE OF A BABY

  1. CHEAP diapers cost about $15 a box…Doesn’t seem bad, but a box lasts about a week, 2 once they are older. That’s what? $60 bucks a month. And don’t forget wipes! a 3 pack for $10! One pack for the car, one for home, one for diaper bag, and by the end of the week you lose all fucking 3!!! And Butt Cream, that’s like anywhere from 5-15 bucks, depending on the kind your baby needs.
  2. Formula- If you aren’t breast-feeding, it’s about $20 a can. Yeah. For food. That they eat every 4 hours or so. That’s a lot of money. And there’s no “oh, it’ll be okay if I water it down or give her juice for a couple of days”…No, it’s not. And bottles?? Shit, DON’T LOSE THEM.
  3. Babysitters- A CHEAP DAYCARE in this shit hole of a town (NNY) is about $180 a week. And that’s poor people status. Hopefully you’re lucky and have a family member or friend to help you out. Especially if you are in school.
  4. CLOTHES- Yeah, teeny tiny baby clothes, can cost just as much as adult clothes. If you ever find yourself in this situation, don’t feel shitty taking help and hand-me-downs. Your baby won’t care if it has on fresh Nikes. He WILL care that his belly is full and his diaper is clean. And any decent mother you know who has a kid a size or two bigger will LOVE to help you out. It’s paying it forward.
  5. Carseat and Crib- Even going cheap on these two will run you about 300-500 bones. And there’s no getting around either

Girls, these are just the ESSENTIALS. Nevermind the fancy bouncy seat(20-100 bucks), the cool play mat (about 45 bucks), playpen(shit, I don’t even KNOW…like 50 bucks?),and God-knows-what-else. And honey, it only gets more expensive as time goes on. Remember that prom dress you want? BEGGED FOR? I bet it’s about $400. Mine was. Now I realize how hard my mom worked for us. Don’t do that to yourself, or your future children now.

Yes, he is cute, but costs more than you can even imagine. WAIT.

Who am I kidding? NO teenager or young adult for that matter who hasn’t at least had to help support their family even GRASPS the value of money. To them, $100 is the lotto. Not a week in gas. So this approach would probably just be equivalent to beating a dead horse. Hmmm. AHA! Teenage girls HATE disgusting things…Lets get some random baby facts going, that no one bothers to tell you before hand!!

PREGNANCY GROSSNESS NO ONE TELLS YOU

  1. Your feet swell, and will stretch out ALL the shoes you wear, and you won’t be able to wear them again
  2. Your hair has a good chance of falling out. And a BIG chance of growing hair where there wasn’t before (chin, belly, nipples…)
  3. Morning sickness can happen whenever, wherever. Like, in the middle of history class.
  4. You also may start lactating…again whenever, where ever…like in the middle of class.
  5. When baby gets big enough it will push on your bladder. Causing you to pee your pants. Like, when you walk, or sneeze, or laugh. How embarrassing.
  6. Hemorrhoids. While pregnant and after labor. It’s a bitch.
  7. You will be an exhausted, hormonal wreck. Sometimes, you hate everyone, you will be a roller coaster.

Not as cute as the celebrities huh? And note the fine hair all over.

LABOR & DELIVERY GROSSNESS NO ONE TELLS YOU

  1. Chances are you will poop, pee and puke all over the delivery table. In front of whoever is in the room (1 doctor, a couple of nurses, your boyfriend, and whoever else you invite in)
  2. Your vagina has to stretch 10 cm to fit a baby. And most of the time, the baby will rip it more on the way out. Or your doctor may just slit it open farther. and this will require stitches.
  3. Your water probably won’t break dramatically, like in movies. No, it’ll leak. Or it may just stay intact and the good ol’ doc will have to take a hook to it and pop it open.
  4. You will bleed. A LOT. and have to wear giant pads. No tampons or sex until you are cleared by your doctor.
  5. Mucus plug- Just what it sound like, girls. A hardish plug of mucus holding everything in your vag. It comes out. Gross.
  6. A c-section is serious and requires TONS of prep time, a shuffling of your insides and you will be sore. For a very very long time.
  7. After you get the vernix-covered baby out, you will need to get the placenta out. This can be done by massaging your very very sore abdomen.

This is the real deal girls. Not the cutesy shit on TV now, is it?

 

BABY GROSSNESS NO ONE TELLS YOU

 

  1. If your baby needed forceps or suction to come out, and a lot do; expect to have a little conehead for a while.
  2. Newborns go through about 10-14 dipes a day. That’s alotta poop and pee
  3. If you have a boy, you WILL get peed on. Guaranteed.
  4. Sleeping when baby sleeps. LMFAO. Get real. You will have bottles to wash, laundry to do, things to catch up on. when you sit down, baby gets up.
  5. Babies wake up A LOT in the night. And want to be fed. You need to be alert and ready for whatever baby wants. Whenever baby wants it.
  6. Spit up will be everywhere. Your hair, your clothes, your skin, quite possibly your mouth. And you will smell like baby spit up.
  7. Cradle cap- its baby dandruff. Rub the head with baby oil, comb the hair and repeat. For however long it takes. It’s actually harmless, but disgusting looking.
  8. The bellybutton- ew. It shrivels up, dries up, and falls out. During that time, it may get infected.

That’s just the BEGINNING, girls. Google “colic”, and “post-partum depression” and “cracked nipples”. Those are always fun!

A baby covered in vernix. With a conehead. JUST about to scream.

Now, here is where these little girls chirp in with “NO, Not me!!! My parents will help me out and do all of this while I go to school, to college, get a job and hangout with my friends!! And my Boyfriend and I will be together 4-Eva, so you have NO IDEA!”

Ahhh. And here is where I break hearts and crush dreams. NO. No, your parents will not be able to be at your EVERY BECK AND CALL as they most likely have JOBS they need to do to support YOU, YOUR CHILD, pay THEIR bills, and no doubt YOUR giant medical bill you racked up under their plan. And HOPEFULLY you will finish school and go to college. and work HARD at it. Let me tell you, any job that pays anything at all is in a few more years, if not already, going to require a COLLEGE EDUCATION. And flippin’ burgers or sellin’ gas ain’t gunna get your baby what she/he needs.

HAHAHAHAHA SOCIAL LIFE?!?!?! Guess what? Your social life just went the way of your virginity. GONE. You may get lucky and have friends that stick by and all that, and they are GOOD FRIENDS. BEST FRIENDS. But while your off being an adult and playing house, they are off ACTING THEIR AGE. And who can blame them? Reverse the roles. Would you rather go to  a house party with tons of friends, good music, food, drinks, and total awesomeness, OR sit inside with your friend and her colicky baby all night bitchin’ about bills? Thought so.

And…give me a minute on this next one…. You and your boyfriend forever, huh? Alright, let’s do some basic math:

The average age for men to marry in the US in 28.4 years old

The average age for women to marry in the US is 26.5 for women

And the divorce rate in the US is…..About 50%

So, please tell ME, how 2 TEENAGERS are going to last in a “Forever” relationship when 1/2 of the people a DECADE OLDER THAN YOU (and with WAYYYYY MORE LIFE EXPERIENCE) can’t handle it?? I don’t care if your 15 or 21. It’s VERY unrealistic it will last, as a person isn’t even fully DEVELOPED until MAYBE age 25. So, bringing a baby into something a volatile as a young relationship is really rather irresponsible. I know, because at 19 I did it myself. And I, like you, thought it would be easy. I, like you was wrong. Granted, I LOVE MY CHILDREN WITH ALL MY HEART. But I think I would’ve liked to stay a “child” a little longer. You have all the time in the WORLD. Take it. Run with it. And when you are older, wiser and ready, share all your cool ass experiences with your children.

if you can’t say something nice…

22 Aug

…don’t say anything at all. One moral I was taught as a child. Another, “turn the other cheek”, and yet another, “as long as you don’t throw the first punch”. Well, gotta say, all of these morals have been corrupted in the past 73 hours. Why? Because I feel no need to be two-faced to people and decided to stick up for myself. So, okay, I did not LITERALLY throw the first punch, but I was however informed that  I needed to take care of my kids, stop being a lazy bitch and put on my big girl panties. Hmm. Now, I suppose I can consider that throwing the first of MANY punches. So, like any normal person, I struck back. Hard. I am used to setting little things aside that people say or do, maybe they could be having some sort of chemical imbalance that’s effecting their better judgement, who knows… But really, to say things to someone like that and then ask for a REASON why I hate you. Hate itself is a strong word. One that I do not use often towards the human race. For example, I hate Nazis and Liars. Not specific people, just traits, per se. But, okay lets take the gloves off for a minute and examine what I may “hate” about someone.

  • lying goes without saying, not a characteristic I tend to find appealing in someone. Okay, I guess maybe if I ever needed a good defense attorney, I may find this particular trait appealing.
  • cheating again, a no-no; just part ways. But, cheating goes right along with lying, you would have to LIE about it or it would be swinging… I think. Well, whatever floats your boat.
  • Two-Face – Okay, so this is bad because really, who wants to become close and friendly with someone, when you just KNOW that all the things you share will become slandered and spread around to who knows where? And it’s not always done in a particularly clever way either. Like, *random example* you probably should not compliment someones hair, makeup and outfit, and then blast on Facebook or some shit how you feel like you just ran into a walking Nightclub. And no, this particular example has never occurred in actual life, just came to me. But, then again, maybe it has. Who knows. Some people are very very good at being shady two-faced assholes.
  • narcissism NOT EVERYTHING IS ABOUT YOU. Turning something around on someone who maybe can’t get you the money for a bill RIGHT THEN AND THERE to alllllllllll of YOUR life problems is not cool. What should be done in this situation is working something out, problem solve. Even more so if this person has never had this occur before. Probably not a good idea to call them what can only be construed as the next, up and coming Casey Anthony and then cry about your own shit, attempting feebly at collecting sympathy
  • Trash talkers- Well, I suppose this COULD go along with the Two-Face, but at the same time, I gotta give props, because hey, at least these people are honest. To a fault. But, if you start running your mouth about my mother, sister, aunt, friend, brother, what have you, that has NOTHING TO DO with the situation at hand, then FUCKIN A, keep them out of your mouth. Because my retaliation will never feel so bad for you.
  • Bad parenting- unless need be, I tend to stay in my own business and not yours when it comes to your parenting skills. Different strokes for different folks. That said, there is really nothing so vile on this earth as someone who has a child and does not parent to their fullest ability. I don’t mean that every single person out there should send their child to some top-notch, fancy-pants Montessori school. But, for the love of all things Holy, if you’re children are such an inconvenience to you, STOP HAVING THEM. If you just like the attention of being pregnant, find a couple with a bum ovary or some nice Lesbos and give them the gift of Life for Pete’s sake.

So, I’m quite sure there’s a few I forgot, but hey. We’re all human. So, any of the above don’t necessarily make a bad person, but contribute to the bad personality they may have. Because, honestly, who hasn’t lied? Who hasn’t gossiped about someone? But continuously doing so over, and over, and OVER. Now, that may be something I would be inclined to HATE about you. If you finally decide to come out and try to punch me with your ridiculous attempts of bringing me down, I’m going to jump up swinging at you like an enraged ninja who just had his fresh Gi soiled with your dirty spit. ESPECIALLY if you use any of that dirty spit to talk unkindly of my family, which you claim to be a part of. From here on out, I’m not taking anymore shit from anyone and am retiring the whole buddha/priest idea of “turning the other cheek” and instead I am going to take a lesson plan out of Margarita’s Book of Knowledge and BURN THAT BRIDGE. And DANCE around that pile of worthless ashes, and maybe just roast those big girl undies that I’m not “lady” enough to wear over them. After that? Continue your games, and I will take said roasted panties and shove them down your throat.

A couple of morals I’m now sticking to:

  • I will no longer forgive and forget.
  • My family = me. Talk badly of my family= fire roasted panties for your breakfast!

 

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